Motivation
October 31, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
It goes without saying that we live in a society that is known for having a blemished moral code. From general everyday crimes to large scale scandals and tales of corruption, ideals of honesty and integrity are usually just that-ideals; and often times fail to be enacted by most of society’s members. Considering this, adults in the role of nurturing and caring for young people should think seriously about how much emphasis they place on maintaining high standards of morality and integrity in the day to day lives of each child.
So much change can occur at the hands of these nurturers, and so much corruption as well.
If you find yourself in one of these roles and haven’t already set high moral standards in your home or school environment, now is the time. Below are a few simple tips on how to go about implanting seeds of fairness and honor in the minds of tomorrow’s leaders.
Effortless intervention
If you’re a busy parent or overloaded school teacher, the idea of setting aside time for yet another objective may seem like a shot in the dark. But one of the great things about good character is that it isn’t rocket science. For most of us it comes naturally, its ingredients are simple, and it can easily be replicated by young people.
One way to effortless teach children to have good character is to simply exhibit it yourself. Being cautious of your statements and actions and living up to your expectations of others (practice what you preach), can do wonders for the nurturing and development of the children you’re in contact with.
General guidelines for successful teaching
When working to better children’s understanding of the importance of honesty and upright character it’s important to be mindful of a few ground rules.
- Be crystal clear about your expectations
This, above all, is one of the most important points to cover. In order for children to work towards an objective they need to know what that objective is. This means being clear about your values with regards to fairness, trustworthiness, respect, empathy and other honorable characteristics.
Likewise, doubt and indecisiveness are detrimental to this campaign. Children can often sense a shaky foundation a mile away. This makes it even more crucial to clarify and reiterate moral goals and objectives over time, as well as to demonstrate and uphold them every time an opportunity arises.
- Explain the personal and societal benefits of uprightness and good character
Along with clarifying your expectations it’s also important to explain your reasons for demanding such morality in the first place. Use interactive activities or interesting examples to illustrate to children the outcome of a moral and just society as well as the immediate rewards for good behavior. This may include being well-liked by others, trusted by teachers and friends, as well as being happy and content with one’s self.
- Be consistent with penalties or demerits for immoral behavior
Show children that you are serious about the limits that you put in place by following up misbehavior with age appropriate repercussions. This may include demerits or punishments for large scale offenses such as cheating, stealing, and lying as well as reprimanding them for more subtle acts such as an unwillingness to compromise, share or show empathy towards others.
- Encourage academic success without going overboard
The pressure to succeed and do well academically is often what pushes many children to cheat on exams and engage in other dishonest or immoral behavior in exchange for a higher mark or score. In retrospect, parents as well as teachers should also bear some of the burden of such actions. This is due to the often heavy emphasis they place on academic achievement and secular success.
Teach children that doing well in school is important for a successful career as well as their own enlightenment but that it’s not the ‘end all’ to everything. There are other ways to demonstrate intelligence outside of academic achievement and other options besides college. And primarily that they should try to aim for a well-balanced life-with regards to school, family, work and leisure activities.
These are just a few issues to consider when working to instill high moral standards in children.
In addition to any workbooks or activities that you may find to assist you in this endeavor, remember that one of the easiest and most important first steps is to simply apply these values to your own life first and foremost.
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This is a guest post by Martha Buckly, she is a blogger and writer since very long time. She loves to travel and to make new experiences. Martha is currently collaborating with few writing services because she wants to share her knowledge about writing with others.
October 30, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Emily, guest contributor
There is this awful and horrible fact that you have to face when you are a mother of two girls: they are becoming teenagers and you are not the center of their world anymore.
Yes, you will stop being that fun mom, and that person that brings the smile and excitement to their faces, just by showing up in their room. Less and less common activities and less and less time will be given to you. You are ceasing to be the main superstar of their lives. But you can still grab some attention from your teenage girls, if you think hard and come up with some fun activities that you can do together with them.
Make a Fashion Show or Photo Session
Everybody nowadays has a smartphone with a great camera. Your girls will always want to go shopping, but besides that, they will also want to look good. You don’t have to spend a ton of money shopping each time you want to spend some time with them. Organize your own fashion show or photo shooting during which they will be models. This is a great way to reorganize the closet as well.
Organize the Movie Night
Just watching a movie together is fine too, but make it a real movie night. Spend some time together, looking for movies to watch and rearrange the living room into a real cinema. Don’t forget the snacks and drinks. If you like and have a time, show you kids how to make snacks and bake them yourselves. In this way, you will have a whole day of preparations and activities so that you get two more extra hours, watching a nice movie. Choose the films together and prepare some tissues if it’s a sad movie!
Organize Your Own Spa Day at Home
Make your home men-free and have your daughters enjoy the day with you in a spa that you will make from your home. This includes preparing all sorts of facial and body scrubs, a lot of nail polish, home-made masks and many other fun things. There are tons of recipes online that show you how to prepare all these things at home. Also, this is a great way to spend time mixing up ingredients and pampering your daughters. Not to mention, this makes a perfect opportunity to show your girls how to take care of themselves and how to indulge themselves while making themselves beautiful at the same time.
Prepare a Meal
Now, this is a tricky one. At first, it may sound too much like a chore to your girls. Therefore, you have to make it look fun. Do it by beginning with their favorite meal and with making the whole thing more interesting by having rules like: “cook, but everybody has to dance/sing.” In this way, they will be more interested and they might just end up learning something.
Eating out is also very fun. All girls love to dress up so they can show up in public and show everyone just how beautiful they are. Fishing for good deals in local restaurants can often inspire you to try out a new place you haven’t been to, and you have a reason to get all dolled up as a family!
Be careful with too much food though, you want your kids healthy!
Whatever you do, try to make it look fun and interesting. Their childhood ends so fast, so make sure you make the most of it.
——
Emily is a mother of two beautiful daughters. She and her husband do everything they can to ensure the safety of their kids.
October 27, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Melanie Hargrave, guest contributor
Being a parent gives you an abundance of parenting components to think about and remember, so naturally many good practices may fall through the cracks. But one of the most important responsibilities that cannot be overlooked by a parent is to constantly set a good example. Here are some signs that you may need to change your habits to not only improve your child’s outlook, but also yourself as a person.
You’re Eating Badly
Your eating habits will leave an impression on your children, whether or not you eat the same foods together. Eating too late and eating sugary or fatty food will imply that children will be able to indulge in those habits when they are older. Be sure to eat foods that are wholesome for both of you. If you are the one protecting them from your own bad eating habits now, who will protect them in the future?
You Don’t Do Housework
Depending on what kind of household you live in, you might have a maid or other help come in to assist you with housework. If your children never see you working, they may get a skewed view of how life is supposed to work as an adult. Make sure you set a chore schedule for the family. Try to make the work fun by operating together as a group.
You’re Inactive
It’s not just your body and mental health you’re affecting by neglecting to exercise. Children have plenty of energy to put toward being active, but the less active you are with them the more that energy will dwindle away. Help your children find sports or hobbies to fall in love with now, so that they’ll start good habits and keep them throughout their lives.
You Shirk Obligations
We’ve all had that party we were planning on going to, but decided not to at the last minute because we were too tired. If your child witnesses this kind of flakiness, it will permanently skew the way they view commitments to others. The next time you or your child feels the desire to shirk an obligation, verbalize your thought process. “Well, I’m tired, and I’d rather stay at home and play. But I made a promise and I can’t break promises.”
You’re in a Bad Relationship
This is a controversial topic, but it depends on what you want for your children. Most feel that the foundation of a family is most important for child development, but to others the relationship between mother and father must be positive for it to do any good. Make sure you are being treated well if you want your children to succeed in their future relationships. If you are stuck in a toxic relationship, consider whether your children’s futures are at stake if you can’t end the relationship for yourself.
You Choose Not to Be Happy
Children are happy creatures, but they also learn quickly. Life as an adult is much harder than it is as a child, but you may want to reevaluate the way you approach it. Happiness is so much about attitude that you should ensure you’re looking at life as positively as possible — if not for yourself, for the sake of your child. Have conversations with them, talk about everything that is going well, and teach them to look for the beauty in life. You will prepare them with valuable tools for the rest of their lives, and you will learn a valuable lesson yourself in the meantime.
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Melanie Hargrave is a wife and homemaker whose pride and joy is her family. In addition to spending time with her husband and daughters, she loves being outdoors, playing sports, and sharing her experiences with others. She is an advocate for women’s rights, and supports Dr. Jeffrey D. Hoefflin and his services for women.
October 25, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Barbara Johnson, guest contributor
As fun as winter can be for your child, it can also be a source of bad moods and negative behavior. The gloomy, snowy days can take a toll on both you and your child. However, there are a few things you can do to help your child combat the winter blues and even perk up your own mood along the way. Take note, though, if you are concerned that your child may be suffering from more than just a few gloomy days and has seasonal affective disorder (SAD) seek out professional medical attention.
Do Activities Together
Sometimes all your child needs is a little distraction to get their mind off of the sad weather and dark interior. Don’t limit yourself to playing board games and watching television though. This is time spent together but it isn’t always quality.
Find some crafts that you can try together and make your own holiday decorations. You can also play some active games indoors that will help spend some of that pent-up energy. Go on a scavenger hunt that leads to a movie theater themed evening indoors. Or test out a new cookie recipe with your child’s help. Share your treats with neighbors or friends. One of these activities can easily take up one afternoon.
Play Outside
Just because there’s snow on the ground doesn’t mean that you can’t have outdoor adventures. In fact, it’s all the more reason to get out there, especially if you live in an area where snow is a rare commodity.
It can be a pain to bundle your child up just to discover they need to use the bathroom or they want to come inside after ten minutes. But if you can make it part of your routine to go outside a couple of times a week, you will surely notice the difference in your child. The cool, fresh air will do them good. Part of the problem with winter blues is feeling cooped up in one place for too long.
Get Out of the House
Winter driving is frightening for some people. But with a little preparation and courage, you can get out of the house for the afternoon and save your family some sanity. Sometimes all you need to cheer up your young one is a change of scenery.
Doing a fun family activity like ice skating, sledding, getting hot chocolate, or looking at Christmas lights is a good way to escape your home but keep everyone together. Noticing the fun aspects of winter and celebrating the cold can be a way to help your child’s mood improve.
Let the Sun In
A very real cause of seasonal affective disorder is lack of sunlight. Keep your own home bright and cheery to contrast the cloudy skies outside. Use lighting that brings a room to life, rather than dimmer, low lighting.
For an even better experience, find ways to let in the sun. Install overhead roof windows while the weather will still allow it. Open up your blinds and let the sun pour in (this is an excellent way to warm your house as well). Wherever you live, find a way to utilize the natural light from the sun. Canadians who experience less sunlight during the day will want to invest in glass doors for Vancouver homes or larger windows for Edmonton.
Your child’s mental health should be a high priority to you. It will be worth it to both of you if you make the extra effort to help them have a more enjoyable winter. Work together to overcome and avoid the winter blues that afflict so many people.
——
Barbara Johnson works in real estate and enjoys finding her clients the perfect homes. In addition, she shares her home improvement and gardening tips with others through blogging.
August 23, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Camping is a great way to spend a few days away from the big city and to show your kids there is an environment different from the Internet and that it’s really worth exploring. Camping is usually associated with fresh air, delicious home-made food and lots of time spent bonding with your family, having actual conversations (you know, without TV interference) and reveling in the beautiful and breathtaking vistas nature has to offer.
Some time away from the constant information bombardment lets you achieve tranquility and peace with yourself, and even though you might enjoy the time off, your children might get bored easily. Luckily, there are tons of things you can while camping that will both let you rest well and entertain your kids. Here are some of the more fun activities you can perform.
Set up the tent
You will be surprised what the right approach can achieve with children. Even though setting up the tent is a job for the adults (obviously), you can be sure that your kids will want to help. And why wouldn’t they? It’s a fun new activity in a totally new place. It’s one of the most interesting things they can do at that moment.
It’s either helping you with the tent, or standing around, poking the ground with a stick waiting for you to check on them every 30 seconds and constantly listening to you telling them to stay near. Doesn’t sound very exciting, does it? Of course, the children won’t have the time to rationalize all of this.
They will just want to help because children like being involved in the same activities adults are doing (that’s part of our learning process). So it’s safe to say your kids will want to help. Let them. Yes, it will take a little more time to set up the tent, but it’s fine – you’re not going anywhere and you’re not in a hurry. The kids will be entertained for a while and they will feel helpful which is enough to make them happy. After you set up the tent, you should also…
Build a fire
This is where it gets a little more dangerous, but the campfire is a classic. Most camp sites have pits already dug up, but if they don’t (or there isn’t one in that particular location), you can always make one. All you need to do is dig up a little hole (like I suppose you’ve seen people dig in movies), surround it with stones to make sure the fire doesn’t escape, and then gather some wood.
Now, the “digging a hole part” you kids will just love. Let them do it all. Guide them if you have to, but let them dig the hole and help them with the stones. Tell them what a good job they are doing and how much they’ve helped you. This positive reinforcement will make them want to help even more. Let them assist you with gathering wood. They will feel great for helping out.
Make sure they don’t disturb the natural order of things around and that they don’t break branches from trees – explain that they should help you gather wood that is already on the ground. Explain these concepts to them – why they should gather this type of tree, why they shouldn’t gather that type of tree – children love learning. If you know something about the area, talk about that, too.
Eating
After all that work, the kids will feel tired and hungry. A lot of time will have passed before you’ve gotten the camp up and running and the children will feel great that they were a part of the process. Now it’s time for the reward.
Eating near the campfire is a magical experience, possibly causing some primeval nostalgia. It gives us a sense of security and harmony and will definitely calm the little ones down. After they’ve eaten, they will probably want to rest for a bit and that will be about your first day there.
Exploring
There are a lot of interesting things to see when you go camping so you can spend some additional time with your children exploring the campsite and showing them different birds, squirrels and other small animals they are bound to find fascinating. Additionally, you can let them take some photos so they can show their friends when they get back.
Everything related to camping is a overall fun and exhilarating experience and you can spice it up even more. All it takes is a bit of imagination.
——
Jessica Conars loves to spend time with her kids. In her professional life she works with Clean To Perfection as a professional cleaner. During weekends she likes to go camping with her family.
August 7, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Contributed anonymously
With so many varying types of activities, lessons, and sports available, how do you know which one is best for your child? If you are looking for something that enhances learning styles, encourages emotional growth, develops confidence and discipline and most importantly is fun, music lessons may be the answer. Music has the power to positively influence your baby while he or she is still in the womb; just imagine how it can influence your child when you put it in his or her hands.
Musical Brain Power
Children (any most of us adults) are naturally drawn to music. More than that, it has an incredible effect on your child’s brain. According to the Department of Neurology at Harvard Medical School, learning a musical instrument advances cognitive development in children, especially in the areas of vocabulary, fine motor skills, auditory discrimination abilities and fine motor skills. Learning music also improves your child’s attention span, listening skills, reasoning, and ability to learn languages. Studies also have shown that children with musical training also tend to have higher academic achievements and go further in post-secondary education.
Your Child’s Social-Emotional Development through Music
Music also impacts your child’s social-emotional development. From toddlers to teens, it can be difficult for your son or daughter to express feelings through words. Music acts as a bridge in helping children to feel, recognize, and express emotions, and then put a name to them. Playing an instrument teaches children to regulate their feelings, manage their impulses, and is a great way to relieve stress. Learning how to incorporate emotion into song dynamics helps to instil compassion and empathy. Any tool you can give your child to prepare them for dealing with the emotional rollercoaster of their childhood or teen years is a definite plus. Research shows that university students with musical training have less anxiety, fewer emotional problems and fewer problems with alcohol compared to their non-musical peers.
Building Confidence One Note at a Time
Excelling academically and emotionally will positively affect your child’s self-esteem. Add that to the confidence your child will gain from becoming skilled at an instrument, and you have a foundation for happiness and success. There is a strong connection between involvement in music and positive self-perception, feelings of success, and leadership skills. Music improves a child’s self-image and helps to encourage positive attitudes. Playing music in band or orchestra also helps children learn how to be good team players and work well with others.
Strings, Keys, and Mouthpieces: Which Instrument to Pick?
After seeing some of the incredible benefits of music lessons, you might be wondering which instrument is best for your child. While piano is the most challenging instrument to learn after violin, it greatly helps kids learn how to sight-read music and grasp the fundamentals of music theory. Knowing how to play piano also can make it easier to learn a secondary instrument. For outgoing children, louder instruments such as drums or trumpet can work best, while shyer children might want to stick to a stringed instrument, or woodwind. Other things to consider include noise level, space, and your budget. Click here to find affordable musical instruments like electronic drum sets, keyboards, recorders and more, allowing you to gauge your child’s interest level before investing in a pricier piece. Remember that there is no ‘easy instrument,’ as everything takes time and practice to learn.
Music is everywhere. Simply listening to music has a powerful effect on your mind and body, and think of how empowering it can be if you are the one creating it. There are many ways to introduce your child to music; through classes like Kindermusik, small groups, individual lessons, or playing around with instruments at home. The true cognitive and emotional benefits from music come from learning a musical instrument in depth and developing musical skill, so practice, practice, practice! Even if your kid doesn’t become the next Mozart, learning music can’t hurt. Start exploring with instruments now and see where music can take you and your child.
July 23, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
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Tony Buchanan, guest contributor
When children are struggling in school, frustration that results from such failures can be overwhelming and daunting especially to the young children. Research has shown that children develop their self-confidence through their achievements. As children accomplish these achievements, they feel more capable, competent, and ready to do more. Success breeds more success in them. Alternatively, a string of failures can lead to erosion of self-confidence and loss of self-esteem and this can lead to failure in other aspects of life.
Thankfully, private tutors can help children with specific academic issues and provide remedial instructions which go a long way in helping your child regain academic excellence and in the long run self-confidence in other tasks.
Below is a peek as to some of the benefits of having a tutor support your child especially in education matters.
Helps Your Child Do Better in School
While tutors rarely have interaction with the child at school, private tutors such as Tutoring for Excellence, can benefit the child to helping him/her achieve academic success. Beyond assisting the child with hard topics, a private tutor can motivate a child to achieve in the classroom. This is due to the fact that the child receives positive reinforcements from the tutor who portrays the image of a role-model to the child. Children also acquire better learning habits and study skills that interpret to good grades in the long run.
Increases the Child’s self-esteem and self-confidence
Academic success attained in school adds up to become a spiral of success in other areas of life. This success strings breeds self-confidence and self-esteem. A high self-esteem is vital to a child’s life. The more confident the child become, the better they become at forming healthy relationships with their parent/caregivers, teachers and peers. These relationships so formed help in ensuring that the child maintains a positive and a healthy lifestyle.
Redefines the importance of education
Tutoring helps the child to keep a positive attitude towards school. The moment the child sees that their parents, teachers and tutors view education as important; they will appreciate the value of education and view it as important. This in turn translates to better grades at school and thus self-confidence.
Importance of teachers, parents and tutors in this process
However, the task of building a child’s self-confidence through education can be a futile task if all the work is left to the tutor. Parents, teachers, and caregivers are also instrumental in building self-confidence and providing a strong support system. Children view them as their champions and thus it is important for them to help strengthen each child’s sense of self, as it serves to protect the child.
Research has shown that, by all the parties being a child’s champion, this serves to boost a child’s protective factors which are crucial in helping the child to resist peer pressures to engage in risky behaviours such as drug abuse and sexual activities. Additionally, these protective factors also determine the child’s relationships with others as well as their success in school.
Simply put, whatever your child’s challenges might be, a qualified tutor can help him/her to overcome learning obstacles and develop self-confidence by serving as a mentor and a guide to your child.
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Tony Buchanan is a passionate blogger, freelance writer and a regular contributor to several blogs. He loves reading news and sharing unique articles through his contents. When Tony is not working, he enjoys music, camping and spending time with his family.
July 16, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Hello. Today’s guest blogger is also a children’s book author who understands how important reading is to developing a child’s mental strengths.
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As a responsible parent, it is your duty to nourish your toddler. Everything that he or she needs should be provided in order to nurture him or her during the process of the developmental stage. Reading is one of the basics of growing up.
For your child to become smart in the future, he or she should be armed up with reading skills before letting them socialize with other kids. Not all kids are born with an innate intelligence so parents should hone it.
After learning the alphabet, the child’s quest to knowledge should not stop there. Parents should give the little one something to practice on. The Children book Lion Who Has Never Given Up could be perfect material for reading.
The words and sentences of this book are very simple. The good thing with this book is it has a free video copy which could be used as a guide for reading to the child. This book fits perfectly with the needs of kids aging from 2-3 (toddlers).
By giving the child reading material, it will develop his or her communications skills. Parents are also advised to talk and bond with the child so that he or she will have an outlet to practice the inputs he or she has learned from the book. This book has an amazing character named Leo who is a small voiced lion.
Ask the kid what he or she has learned after reading and listening to the free video provided together with the digital copy. By asking questions to the child, it could also develop his or her ability to comprehend of what happened in the story being read. This book will also guide his or her personality towards reaching a certain goal. It will make the child understand that whenever he or she wants something, it should be attained by persevering.
The book does not only contain a wonderful story that is revolving around the life of Leo, the small voiced Lion. It also provides stunning illustration that will feed the child’s imagination. The main purpose of this book is not only to entertain the child but to develop his or her basic reading skills.
While gaining the skills, the personality development is also being honed due to the moral impact created by the story itself. The effect could not be observed directly but as your child grows up, he or she can subtly associate the good things he or she has learned from this book.
Get this book and your child will surely love it. This is a perfect learning material for toddlers who are just starting to read. Make them start turning up the pages and they will never stop.
Below is a short trailer what this amazing kids’ story is about:
For more great books for kids, please visit us at bestbooksfor3yearolds.com. You’ll find there many devoping books for your little one.
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Eric Russell, children’s book author
July 12, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Summer vacation is finally here, and now that school is done your child might also be ready to put an end to his other commitments. Whether it’s the baseball team, summer camp, or karate class, it is inevitable that at some point your child is going to want to quit. So how do you handle it?
First, realize that this is a great opportunity to talk to your child about perseverance, which is a life skill that is absolutely vital to his success. You can talk about perseverance until you’re blue in the face, but until the time comes when your child actually wants to quit, it’s difficult to put it into practice.
Exceptions to the rule
There are a couple instances in which it is okay to let your child quit. First, if it is an unsafe environment. If during any activity, there are clearly unsafe conditions you must remove your child from that environment. No activity is worth the chance of a serious injury. The second is if the activity has no value. Families are just too busy nowadays to participate in any activity that is not going to increase their child’s chances for success. Any activity your child participates in should help him to become more confident, more disciplined, and more focused.
Most of the time, however, quitting should not be an option. What if your child says he is bored? Boredom is often a sign that your child just needs to be challenged differently. If your child says he’s bored, talk to the coach, counselor, or instructor about what you can do to re-motivate him so he can continue to grow.
Times to press on
He might say it’s too hard, but the only way to experience growth is to step outside of your comfort zone. In any kind of development, it has to be hard before it is easy. Working through that discomfort or difficulty is what is going to give your child the confidence to overcome other obstacles in the future.
Another reason kids want to quit is that they are involved in too many activities. One of the most important lessons we can teach is time management and how to prioritize commitments. If your child committed to something, now is a great time to teach those lessons. Once the commitment is fulfilled, talk as a family about which activities you all think are most important to continue. Remember to give more weight to those activities that have more value.
Many times a child will want to quit when starting a new grade or school. We know one of the best ways to develop confidence is through past experience. In times of transition, whether it’s starting a new school or a new grade, it’s important that children have something consistent that they know they’re good at. Even with an increased workload, they should have a positive, structured after-school activity that will help to develop focus and good work habits.
You might feel bad about forcing your child to stick with it, but why? It’s good for him, isn’t it? You force him to brush his teeth, take baths, eat his vegetables, turn off the TV and do his homework, right? This should be no different. As a parent it is your responsibility to look out for your child’s best interest even when they don’t like what that means in the short term.
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Contributed by Solomon Brenner master instructor Action Karate and Author of Black Belt Parenting. The art of raising your child for success
July 11, 2013 | 0 Comment(s)
Recently an analysis was made of 100 of the most successful people in the world. Their ages ranged from around 21 to over 70. Their level of education extended from grade school to the Ph.D. level. Many of their other traits and characteristics varied greatly, but they all had one thing in common: all of them were “good-finders.” They could see the good in other people and in every situation.
There was once a little boy who, angry with his mother, shouted at her, “I hate you!” Afraid that he would be punished, he ran out of the house to the top of a nearby hill and shouted into the valley, “I hate you!” Back from the valley he heard, “I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!” Startled, the boy ran back home and told his mother about the mean little boy in the valley who had shouted that he hated him. His mother led him back to the hillside and told him to shout, “I love you!” He did as he was told and this time heard a nice little boy saying, “I love you! I love you! I love you!”
Looking for the good
Life is like the echo in that valley. Whatever you send out comes back. You reap what you sow. What you see in others exists in you. These successful people saw the good in every person and in every situation. They were able to identify and use the good in themselves because they saw it in other people. Having a positive attitude can completely alter the way your life’s events affect you.
You treat people exactly as you see them. In order to find the good or ability in a person, all you have to do is look for it. Once you find that good or ability in the other person, you treat him better and he performs better.
If you always jump automatically to the negative perception of a person or a situation, think about how that makes you look to other people. They only hear negativity and believe you are a negative person. When something good happens or a great opportunity presents itself to them, will they want to share that positive experience with someone who is always negative?
How you can find it
Here’s a good exercise that you can do with your family at home. Every time something bad or negative happens, write down the date. Instead of writing the negative thing, write down something positive that came out of it or could come out of it with the right mindset. When you look at the list, you will only see positive events and that will be what you are able to focus on.
If your child complains about someone they don’t like at school or on their baseball team, ask them to name one good thing about that person. Remind them, too, that a lot of times people are negative, mean or unhappy people because something or someone in their life made them that way. They shouldn’t jump to judge someone they don’t know because they are only seeing part of the picture. Not only that, but by returning their negativity with kindness they are more likely to receive kindness in return.
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Contributed by Solomon Brenner master instructor Action Karate and Author of Black Belt Parenting. The art of raising your child for success
